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"Supernatural" As Told By Someone Who’s Never Seen It

1. So there’s these two brother lovers.

So there's these two brother lovers.

They’re definitely brothers, and maybe lovers?

2. This is the pretty one. He’s like America’s Next Top Model pretty.

This is the pretty one. He's like America's Next Top Model pretty.

He used to model these……….brick pants? Under the name Jenny Thunder?

3. Top Model loves pie. Which is not a metaphor.

"Supernatural" As Told By Someone Who's Never Seen It

6. The other one is a very attractive moose.

"Supernatural" As Told By Someone Who's Never Seen It

7. And they hunt demons together and save the world and are humanity’s last hope.

And they hunt demons together and save the world and are humanity's last hope.

8. The brother lovers hate their super hot Dad who also used to hunt demons.

The brother lovers hate their super hot Dad who also used to hunt demons.

IDK he left them to kill things? Or maybe just to get more cigarettes? He’s dead? Or maybe in like purgatory?

9. And they love their fake Dad who also hunts demons.

"Supernatural" As Told By Someone Who's Never Seen It

10. Their tragic backstory begins with their Mom on the ceiling.

Their tragic backstory begins with their Mom on the ceiling.

Cause of death: Demons. Recommended Therapy: Dedicate your life and the life of your two sons to avenging her death.

11. Apparently the Moose has an Electra complex because his girlfriend, Tyra from FNL, dies the same way.

Apparently the Moose has an Electra complex because his girlfriend, Tyra from FNL , dies the same way.

It’s okay Tyra you get to date Tim Riggins and Landry, you don’t need this moose.

12. Actually all the *love interests on this show seem to die horrifically.

"Supernatural" As Told By Someone Who's Never Seen It

Poor Duncan Kane’s dead baby mama from Veronica Mars.

13. *Correction

*Correction

14. EVERYONE on this show seems to die horrifically.

EVERYONE on this show seems to die horrifically.

15. (pause to pour one out for the redshirts)

(pause to pour one out for the redshirts)

16. But they seem to kick ass on the way out so it’s fine.

"Supernatural" As Told By Someone Who's Never Seen It

17. Unless they come back possessed? Pretty sure she’s the Devil now.

"Supernatural" As Told By Someone Who's Never Seen It

18. Just kidding Jacob from Lost is the Devil. And he has a huge crush on the Moose.

Just kidding Jacob from Lost is the Devil. And he has a huge crush on the Moose.

19. It’s okay though, the brother lovers have this Yogurt Man to help them fight the Devil.

It's okay though, the brother lovers have this Yogurt Man to help them fight the Devil.

20. Yogurt Man is like this totally fearsome reBeL angel.

"Supernatural" As Told By Someone Who's Never Seen It

(note sexy brooding black wings)

21. His smack talk might need work though.

"Supernatural" As Told By Someone Who's Never Seen It

22. Actually all his talk might need work.

"Supernatural" As Told By Someone Who's Never Seen It

25. That’s okay, Top Model loves Yogurt Man anyway.

"Supernatural" As Told By Someone Who's Never Seen It

26. So it’s obviously going to end tragically and in fire.

"Supernatural" As Told By Someone Who's Never Seen It

I’m sensing a pattern.

27. Don’t cry over your lost yogurty love Top Model, you’ll feel better after a milkshake.

"Supernatural" As Told By Someone Who's Never Seen It

28. Why not invite your friend the New Guy over so he can cheer you up with sock puppet theater?

"Supernatural" As Told By Someone Who's Never Seen It

29. Or blast some epic thrash metal while driving too fast in your studmobile?

"Supernatural" As Told By Someone Who's Never Seen It

30. See? You totally feel better, dance it out Top Model.

"Supernatural" As Told By Someone Who's Never Seen It

31. J/K this is the initiation dance of the brother lovers’ secret midnight society, Team Free Will. I can only assume they sashay demons to death.

"Supernatural" As Told By Someone Who's Never Seen It

Respect the rituals damn it.

32. And that’s basically it, that’s the show.

And that's basically it, that's the show.

33. Conclusion: Mark Sheppard is on it and therefore it must be good.

"Supernatural" As Told By Someone Who's Never Seen It

Adding to my watch list ASAP.

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