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How To Write ESPN’s Ridiculous General Sports Tweets

Say something “everyone does.” Like this:

Say something "everyone does." Like this:

… especially if you follow ESPN

Source: @espn  /  via: twitter.com

Or this:

Or this:
Source: @espn  /  via: twitter.com

Mix in a joke about a popular event

Mix in a joke about a popular event

Look the Oscars are happening please love us.

Source: @espn  /  via: twitter.com

…Or, awww, Valentine’s Day

...Or, awww, Valentine's Day
Source: @espn  /  via: twitter.com

Day of the week + sports =

Day of the week + sports =

it’s friday, friday

Source: @espn  /  via: twitter.com

Something utterly incomprehensible and throw in a #hashtag

Something utterly incomprehensible and throw in a #hashtag

220 people apparently do that, orrrrr…?

Source: @espn  /  via: twitter.com

Remember high school?

Remember high school?
Source: @espn  /  via: twitter.com

Ugh the WORST

Ugh the WORST
Source: @espn  /  via: twitter.com

You’re just like sports people!

You're just like sports people!
Source: @espn  /  via: twitter.com

Reading this whole list has gotten me pretty depressed…

Reading this whole list has gotten me pretty depressed...

Oh, thanks, ESPN.

(Disclaimer: this is impossible if you’re a Mets fan)

Source: @espn  /  via: twitter.com
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