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26 Reasons Why “The Following” Has The Sexiest Serial Killer On TV

1. Everyone, this is Joe Carroll from The Following. Joe, say hello to everyone!

Everyone, this is Joe Carroll from The Following . Joe, say hello to everyone!

[Insert British accent here.]

2. In the spirit of full disclosure—you may want to sit down for this—Joe’s a serial killer.

26 Reasons Why "The Following" Has The Sexiest Serial Killer On TV

Sorry.

3. But, like, a pretty hot one, right?

26 Reasons Why "The Following" Has The Sexiest Serial Killer On TV

Mmm killer lips.

4. Yes, I know, the man kills people.

Yes, I know, the man kills people.

5. And he’s got that weird obsession with Edgar Allan Poe.

And he's got that weird obsession with Edgar Allan Poe.

Quoth the Raven: Get a new muse!

6. But he’s also a scholarly professor!

26 Reasons Why "The Following" Has The Sexiest Serial Killer On TV

7. Hot for teacher, anyone?!

26 Reasons Why "The Following" Has The Sexiest Serial Killer On TV

8. And orange is an oddly flattering color on him.

26 Reasons Why "The Following" Has The Sexiest Serial Killer On TV

Prison orange, to be specific.

9. Plus, he’s not afraid to role-play!

Plus, he's not afraid to role-play!

10. Or wear cardigans!

Or wear cardigans!

11. Or drink!

Or drink!

12. Dang boo, you need me to fill up that glass or what?

Dang boo, you need me to fill up that glass or what?

Danggg.

13. Sometimes he cheats on his wife*.

Sometimes he cheats on his wife*.

*Who’s technically his ex-wife, but that’s just semantics, really.

14. And it’s pretty sexy, actually.

26 Reasons Why "The Following" Has The Sexiest Serial Killer On TV

15. OK, more than sexy.

26 Reasons Why "The Following" Has The Sexiest Serial Killer On TV

16. ALRIGHT, I’M ABOUT TO BLACKOUT SO SOMEONE CALL 9-1-1.

26 Reasons Why "The Following" Has The Sexiest Serial Killer On TV

17. Other times, he and K-Bacon eye fuck the hell out of each other.

26 Reasons Why "The Following" Has The Sexiest Serial Killer On TV

18. And yes, I realize that he is STILL a serial killer.

26 Reasons Why "The Following" Has The Sexiest Serial Killer On TV

Who sometimes likes to keep creepy souvenirs from his victims.

19. Who’s cultivating a following of other killers for terrifying things.

Who's cultivating a following of other killers for terrifying things.

His followers are pretty hot too. Just saying.

20. But just look at that face!

26 Reasons Why "The Following" Has The Sexiest Serial Killer On TV

21. All Joe wants is someone to love…

26 Reasons Why "The Following" Has The Sexiest Serial Killer On TV

And choke to death…

22. And someone to kill.

And someone to kill.

23. Because deep down, Joe is a man who genuinely cares…

Because deep down, Joe is a man who genuinely cares...

24. …about killing.

26 Reasons Why "The Following" Has The Sexiest Serial Killer On TV

25. And looking fresh to death while he does it.

And looking fresh to death while he does it.

No pun intended!

26. So, what do you say, will you join Joe’s following of fans?

So, what do you say, will you join Joe's following of fans?

If for no other reason than the man is undeniably hot. And he’ll probs kill you if you don’t agree. It’s a safety issue, really.

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