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15 More Very Questionable Retro Inventions

1. Facial Snow Shield

Facial Snow Shield

Via Canada, from 1939.
No, no, no, NO.

2.

I like the idea behind it.
But, much like the show shields above, I foresee suffocation.

3. Gas Attack Baby Stroller

Gas Attack Baby Stroller

Via England.

4. Bronze Lips

Bronze Lips

“…cover your lips with our goo…”
For you Overly Attached Girlfriends.

5. Car Dog Walker

Car Dog Walker

Let’s move on to animal abuse.
WHAT COULD GO WRONG?

6. Running Board Dog Sack

Running Board Dog Sack

1936.
Define “comfortably.”

7. RectoRotor

RectoRotor

15 seems such a random cutoff age…

8. Wooden Bathing Suits

Wooden Bathing Suits

For those who don’t float well.

9. “Mobile” Phone

"Mobile" Phone

Poor guy.

10. Dimple Machine

Dimple Machine

Worked wonders, I’m sure.

11. Glide-O-Bike

Glide-O-Bike

1931.
25¢ starts you dying, too.

12. Entire Family Bike

Entire Family Bike

…with a built-in sewing machine.

13. Solar Bath Apparatus

Solar Bath Apparatus

1933.
“Diseases of the head” is such a broad term.

14. Eye Exerciser

Eye Exerciser

1938.

15. Amphibious Bike

Amphibious Bike

The look on the test subject’s face says it all.

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